Thursday, February 28, 2008
Monday, February 25, 2008
Friday, February 22, 2008
The Old Road
I am an old road,
rutted, worn and weather-wise;
hardscrabble and dirt brown.
My name is now
forgotten. Once I was
going somewhere.
Today, it’s neither here
nor there; a dead end.
I wait and wonder,
dozing and doting,
under winter snows
for the plow.
rutted, worn and weather-wise;
hardscrabble and dirt brown.
My name is now
forgotten. Once I was
going somewhere.
Today, it’s neither here
nor there; a dead end.
I wait and wonder,
dozing and doting,
under winter snows
for the plow.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
You Never Really Know Someone
You never really know someone, as this true story will illustrate. My step-brother had been divorced and re-married. He married a woman by the name of Marge. Marge had been previously married as well and had grown children and even grandchildren. Prior to she and my step-brother getting married, Marge had job and a house of her own. She sold her house when she and my step brother were married. They had been married for ten years or more and I had met Marge on several occasions. She seemed like a perfectly normal grandmother of nearly 60. There was no sign she lived another life.
One day Marge announced that she had made plans to visit her son, a police officer, who lived in Minnesota. There seemed to be nothing unusual about that as she had done this before, but probably not as often as she would have liked. She made plans in the typical way and when she arrived in Minnesota she rented a car as travelers often do.
The first thing she did after getting her car was to go and rob a bank. She wore a big sun hat and glasses and pulled into the drive through. She handed the teller a threatening note, stating that if she were not given money, it would be “curtains” for everyone. She was given a bag full of money. The ironic thing is that my step-brother owned a curtain and drapes business.
I am not sure why, perhaps she did not get as much money as she hoped, but about 30 minutes later she robbed another bank. The cops get angry when you rob one bank, but they go totally mad if you rob more than one in the same day. Furthermore, they are more prepared. It wasn’t long afterwards that Marge was caught.
In the car, they found the hat and glasses and photocopies of the note she used. They also found the money of course. It seemed to be a clear cut case.
Since robbing a bank is a federal offense, the FBI became involved. When things like this happen, they assume that it didn’t happen out of the blue and that there had to be more cases, so they began looking at unsolved robberies by apparently older women in the greater area in which my step brother and Marge lived. It turned out that there had been a string of such hold-ups and that the police had nicknamed the culprit the “Grandmother Bandit”. All told, they discovered that she had likely robbed 7 banks in three different states, several convenience stores and a Cracker Barrel restaurant.
At first Marge pled not guilty, but later changed her plea to guilty. She never explained why she did what she did, not to the police and not to my step brother; not to anyone.
Marge has served 5 years in federal prison. My family stays in regular contact with letters and cards and such and she writes back often. She seems to have had good spirits throughout her time in prison and she even got a job and helped tutor the other prisoners. She said that prison wasn’t so bad.
To this day, the whole thing remains a mystery. While my family has remained in touch, they never mention what happened and neither does Marge. She is due to be released this year. It will be interesting to see what happens then.
In the end, you wonder why a woman of nearly 60, a mother and a grandmother, with a nice home, solid income and a faithful husband would suddenly take up robbery. If so, why? Why then? Did she need money to support a lifestyle she couldn’t afford?. Was it the thrill? Or had she been doing this for years, right under my step brothers nose, and was only just caught with several crimes still unsolved which are attributable to her? We’ll never know. Marge isn’t telling. The one thing we can know for sure is that you can never really know another person.
One day Marge announced that she had made plans to visit her son, a police officer, who lived in Minnesota. There seemed to be nothing unusual about that as she had done this before, but probably not as often as she would have liked. She made plans in the typical way and when she arrived in Minnesota she rented a car as travelers often do.
The first thing she did after getting her car was to go and rob a bank. She wore a big sun hat and glasses and pulled into the drive through. She handed the teller a threatening note, stating that if she were not given money, it would be “curtains” for everyone. She was given a bag full of money. The ironic thing is that my step-brother owned a curtain and drapes business.
I am not sure why, perhaps she did not get as much money as she hoped, but about 30 minutes later she robbed another bank. The cops get angry when you rob one bank, but they go totally mad if you rob more than one in the same day. Furthermore, they are more prepared. It wasn’t long afterwards that Marge was caught.
In the car, they found the hat and glasses and photocopies of the note she used. They also found the money of course. It seemed to be a clear cut case.
Since robbing a bank is a federal offense, the FBI became involved. When things like this happen, they assume that it didn’t happen out of the blue and that there had to be more cases, so they began looking at unsolved robberies by apparently older women in the greater area in which my step brother and Marge lived. It turned out that there had been a string of such hold-ups and that the police had nicknamed the culprit the “Grandmother Bandit”. All told, they discovered that she had likely robbed 7 banks in three different states, several convenience stores and a Cracker Barrel restaurant.
At first Marge pled not guilty, but later changed her plea to guilty. She never explained why she did what she did, not to the police and not to my step brother; not to anyone.
Marge has served 5 years in federal prison. My family stays in regular contact with letters and cards and such and she writes back often. She seems to have had good spirits throughout her time in prison and she even got a job and helped tutor the other prisoners. She said that prison wasn’t so bad.
To this day, the whole thing remains a mystery. While my family has remained in touch, they never mention what happened and neither does Marge. She is due to be released this year. It will be interesting to see what happens then.
In the end, you wonder why a woman of nearly 60, a mother and a grandmother, with a nice home, solid income and a faithful husband would suddenly take up robbery. If so, why? Why then? Did she need money to support a lifestyle she couldn’t afford?. Was it the thrill? Or had she been doing this for years, right under my step brothers nose, and was only just caught with several crimes still unsolved which are attributable to her? We’ll never know. Marge isn’t telling. The one thing we can know for sure is that you can never really know another person.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Molly's Plight
Molly, our dog, a Boxer girl, has limped on and off over the years. The vet thought that it was Lyme disease and treated her accordingly. The treatment appeared to help and the limping would stop for awhile, sometimes for a year or more; until last year, when she began to limp again, this time persistently and not intermittently.
We took her to the vet who thought that her condition was either caused by a tumor or Degenerative Myelopathy. He said that if it was a tumor it would most likely be a type that would not show up on most types of imaging, MRI, X-Ray, etc. Degenerative
Myelopathy ( D.M. ) is common in German Shepherds, Irish Setters and Chesapeake Bay Retrievers, among others, but less so ( or at least less diagnosed ) in Boxers. DM is a disorder of the spinal column and nervous tissue, which normally starts when the dog is in advanced age. Molly is now about nine years of age. The disease is marked by ataxia, or the inability to coordinate the limbs, usually the hind limbs at first. The sheath or outer covering of the nerves begins to deteriorate and therefore, they cannot conduct nerve impulses as well. DM is diagnosed when other disorders with the same symptoms, such as slipped disks and the aforementioned spinal tumors, are ruled out.
Over the next few months, in addition to limping, Molly also began to trip over her foot, which was often no longer straight, but bent at a funny angle, with her “elbow” cocked outwards. She also began to “club” her foot. Her toes roll over and she walks on the top of her foot. The onset of symptoms with the tumor and DM are similar, but the progression is different. Given Molly’s symptoms, we now believe that she has DM.
Like any of us with a disability, some days are better for Molly than others. At first the disease did not impair Molly much, but within the past 6 months, she has lost a lot of muscle tone in her hindquarters. She can no longer go up the stairs, though she can manage, for now, the two steps on our porch which lead outside. She is also now very afraid to walk on slippery surfaces. When she does, she has no control over her affected leg, and it “skates” out from under her. She is good with rugs, so we have had to put area
rugs down all over our hardwood and tiled floors. She can also no longer get on the couch, but needs help to get up. Sometimes her legs become entangled and she trips over herself and falls down. We are on constant look out for Molly to ensure her safety.
My wife and I joined an informational support group on the internet about the disease. I had no idea it was so common. It is one of the busiest lists to which I have ever belonged. What’s the prognosis for Molly? We have been taking her for regular treatments, including acupuncture and chiropractic. Diet and exercise are important. There may also be medication available which can mitigate the disease. We have tried various slings and such with limited success. There is no cure, but we can add quality and quantity to her life. We bought her booties to wear so that she does not cut up the top of her foot, which is common for dogs with DM. They also help with traction. Molly will only get worse, and at some point, we may be looking at a doggie wheelchair, or a “cart”. Many dogs take well to these mobility aids because it provides them a new found sense of freedom which they had otherwise lost.
Molly will continue to lose control over her rear end. She has begun to club her other foot. She may lose control over her other leg as well. In later stages of the disease, she may lose control over her bodily functions, such as her bladder. For this reason, urinary tract infections are also common with dogs that have DM.
The average life expectancy for a Boxer is about 10 years. We feel confident that we can help her see that number and even beyond. Molly is still in good spirits, she still likes to play and occasionally still tries to run, in a hopping style of gait. We dote over her more and we let her sniff for longer periods outside. We don’t know how much time she may have left, but for now, she is still the queen of the house.
We took her to the vet who thought that her condition was either caused by a tumor or Degenerative Myelopathy. He said that if it was a tumor it would most likely be a type that would not show up on most types of imaging, MRI, X-Ray, etc. Degenerative
Myelopathy ( D.M. ) is common in German Shepherds, Irish Setters and Chesapeake Bay Retrievers, among others, but less so ( or at least less diagnosed ) in Boxers. DM is a disorder of the spinal column and nervous tissue, which normally starts when the dog is in advanced age. Molly is now about nine years of age. The disease is marked by ataxia, or the inability to coordinate the limbs, usually the hind limbs at first. The sheath or outer covering of the nerves begins to deteriorate and therefore, they cannot conduct nerve impulses as well. DM is diagnosed when other disorders with the same symptoms, such as slipped disks and the aforementioned spinal tumors, are ruled out.
Over the next few months, in addition to limping, Molly also began to trip over her foot, which was often no longer straight, but bent at a funny angle, with her “elbow” cocked outwards. She also began to “club” her foot. Her toes roll over and she walks on the top of her foot. The onset of symptoms with the tumor and DM are similar, but the progression is different. Given Molly’s symptoms, we now believe that she has DM.
Like any of us with a disability, some days are better for Molly than others. At first the disease did not impair Molly much, but within the past 6 months, she has lost a lot of muscle tone in her hindquarters. She can no longer go up the stairs, though she can manage, for now, the two steps on our porch which lead outside. She is also now very afraid to walk on slippery surfaces. When she does, she has no control over her affected leg, and it “skates” out from under her. She is good with rugs, so we have had to put area
rugs down all over our hardwood and tiled floors. She can also no longer get on the couch, but needs help to get up. Sometimes her legs become entangled and she trips over herself and falls down. We are on constant look out for Molly to ensure her safety.
My wife and I joined an informational support group on the internet about the disease. I had no idea it was so common. It is one of the busiest lists to which I have ever belonged. What’s the prognosis for Molly? We have been taking her for regular treatments, including acupuncture and chiropractic. Diet and exercise are important. There may also be medication available which can mitigate the disease. We have tried various slings and such with limited success. There is no cure, but we can add quality and quantity to her life. We bought her booties to wear so that she does not cut up the top of her foot, which is common for dogs with DM. They also help with traction. Molly will only get worse, and at some point, we may be looking at a doggie wheelchair, or a “cart”. Many dogs take well to these mobility aids because it provides them a new found sense of freedom which they had otherwise lost.
Molly will continue to lose control over her rear end. She has begun to club her other foot. She may lose control over her other leg as well. In later stages of the disease, she may lose control over her bodily functions, such as her bladder. For this reason, urinary tract infections are also common with dogs that have DM.
The average life expectancy for a Boxer is about 10 years. We feel confident that we can help her see that number and even beyond. Molly is still in good spirits, she still likes to play and occasionally still tries to run, in a hopping style of gait. We dote over her more and we let her sniff for longer periods outside. We don’t know how much time she may have left, but for now, she is still the queen of the house.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
The Stupidity of Crowds
A colleague of mine was telling me of a book he was reading entitled “The Wisdom of Crowds”. Now, I haven’t read the book, but knowing what I do of humanities foibles I am already dubious of this books premise. Last night I was watching a television show about North Korea which made me think of this book. The closed and paranoid government of Kim Jong Il had agreed to a rare opportunity for a western journalist to visit the country. What I saw was mind blowing! I had always wondered how the Germans could have been duped by Hitler, and in this example of North Korea, it is painfully clear. There is a recipe of sorts you can follow which is in part: 1) Create fear of outside influences 2) Control the media 3) Tightly control borders 4) Dish out rewards and punishment capriciously 5) Beat the people into subservitude, preferably through poverty and famine 6) Take credit for everything that goes right and deny that anything goes wrong.
In North Korea the people are very poor. If you do something against the government, your whole family is sent to prison camps. Everything is against the government. People are punished for hunting mice to eat because there is nothing else. Young boys fought over a corn kernel they found in a cows shit so that they could eat it, so desperate is their plight. In the media there is only good news of the Great Leader’s doings. You must watch these shows ( if you have TV ). The police come around to ensure that you are only reading and seeing appropriate, government approved, media. Everyone has pictures of the Great Leader in their home and larger than life portraits and statutes adorn every building and village square. You must always thank the Great General for what you have, as we here may say grace before a meal. The journalist was allowed in because she was with a small contingent of South Korean’s coming to the country to provide humanitarian aid; specifically optical surgery. Over the course of several days a doctor performed cataract surgery on 1,000 people, many of whom had been blind for years. When they could see, the first thing they did was to prostrate themselves at the feet of the Great Leaders photograph and thank him for their restored sight. Thank him! No one thanked the doctor! The doctor had all his patients waiting in a large auditorium and each would get up and do this “I can see” dance and then collapse under the Great Leaders photograph while the assembled throng cheered exuberantly. If there exists a better example of brain washing, I have yet to see it. I truly believe that people believed what they were saying.
So, where is the wisdom of crowds? After seeing what was happening in North Korea, my thoughts went to my own government. How do we know what they say and do is the truth? We don’t and we should always be suspicious. Question authority! It is my duty as a free person to criticize my government ( not just the feds either, state and local governments count too, this is where tyranny often starts, at home ). The alternative is all too scary and all too real. I wont accept a diminishment of liberty. Therefore, we all must be on constant guard.
In North Korea the people are very poor. If you do something against the government, your whole family is sent to prison camps. Everything is against the government. People are punished for hunting mice to eat because there is nothing else. Young boys fought over a corn kernel they found in a cows shit so that they could eat it, so desperate is their plight. In the media there is only good news of the Great Leader’s doings. You must watch these shows ( if you have TV ). The police come around to ensure that you are only reading and seeing appropriate, government approved, media. Everyone has pictures of the Great Leader in their home and larger than life portraits and statutes adorn every building and village square. You must always thank the Great General for what you have, as we here may say grace before a meal. The journalist was allowed in because she was with a small contingent of South Korean’s coming to the country to provide humanitarian aid; specifically optical surgery. Over the course of several days a doctor performed cataract surgery on 1,000 people, many of whom had been blind for years. When they could see, the first thing they did was to prostrate themselves at the feet of the Great Leaders photograph and thank him for their restored sight. Thank him! No one thanked the doctor! The doctor had all his patients waiting in a large auditorium and each would get up and do this “I can see” dance and then collapse under the Great Leaders photograph while the assembled throng cheered exuberantly. If there exists a better example of brain washing, I have yet to see it. I truly believe that people believed what they were saying.
So, where is the wisdom of crowds? After seeing what was happening in North Korea, my thoughts went to my own government. How do we know what they say and do is the truth? We don’t and we should always be suspicious. Question authority! It is my duty as a free person to criticize my government ( not just the feds either, state and local governments count too, this is where tyranny often starts, at home ). The alternative is all too scary and all too real. I wont accept a diminishment of liberty. Therefore, we all must be on constant guard.
Howdy!
A big shout out goes to my good friend Jim, who I believe is the only person besides me who is actually reading this blog! Yo, Jim! Its nice to have an audience, even if its an audience of one!
Friday, February 15, 2008
If I were President
My most important priority: Pursuing renewable forms of energy, probably hydrogen, and instituting this nationwide, to reduce our dependence on oil. This will improve the environment and be good for our national security.
The war in Iraq: I would pull all my troops back to the border, ensure that no foreign instigators get in. Then I would let the different factions duke it out. Then when they are tired, I would come back in and beat the winner into obedience. I would then set up a government backing the clan that most reflects our values. I would then try to pull out of there as quickly as possible, but I would state for the record that we would not allow a Iranian type regime in power, ever.
The economy: I would scale back many of the stupid social programs, unfunded mandates and other ridiculous laws that dampen free enterprise, choke our businesses, clog up our legal system and reduce civil rights.
Healthcare: Healthcare is not a right, but at the same time it should be affordable. What makes it expensive are the insurance companies and liability issues on the part of doctors. I would minimize the role of the insurance company ( just in general, I hate them ) and can you say, TORT REFORM! No one in this country is ever responsible for their own shit, some else always is. Enough of that crap!
Crime: I would set up a panel to do a quick analysis of all the cases for those who sit on death row. If it is pretty clear cut that the sucker is guilty, I would line them all up on the Washington Mall, be sure to have called all the major media outlets, and then I would shoot them all in the back of the head on national TV. Can you say “deterrence”?
Government: Smaller government. I would shut down idiotic programs like the DMV
( I know these are state entities, but this is an example ).
Education; Hey, if you don’t like the education system where you live, then F’n move or do something about it! Busing kids elsewhere is stupid. You cant make someone learn, so tying teachers salaries to test scores is like tying a persons taxes to how much they take a dump.
Taxes: Ok, we gotta have them, but Jeez, can we make it so that the average American with a 16th grade education can at least figure this out?
Just some random thoughts inspired by our current national political debates.
The war in Iraq: I would pull all my troops back to the border, ensure that no foreign instigators get in. Then I would let the different factions duke it out. Then when they are tired, I would come back in and beat the winner into obedience. I would then set up a government backing the clan that most reflects our values. I would then try to pull out of there as quickly as possible, but I would state for the record that we would not allow a Iranian type regime in power, ever.
The economy: I would scale back many of the stupid social programs, unfunded mandates and other ridiculous laws that dampen free enterprise, choke our businesses, clog up our legal system and reduce civil rights.
Healthcare: Healthcare is not a right, but at the same time it should be affordable. What makes it expensive are the insurance companies and liability issues on the part of doctors. I would minimize the role of the insurance company ( just in general, I hate them ) and can you say, TORT REFORM! No one in this country is ever responsible for their own shit, some else always is. Enough of that crap!
Crime: I would set up a panel to do a quick analysis of all the cases for those who sit on death row. If it is pretty clear cut that the sucker is guilty, I would line them all up on the Washington Mall, be sure to have called all the major media outlets, and then I would shoot them all in the back of the head on national TV. Can you say “deterrence”?
Government: Smaller government. I would shut down idiotic programs like the DMV
( I know these are state entities, but this is an example ).
Education; Hey, if you don’t like the education system where you live, then F’n move or do something about it! Busing kids elsewhere is stupid. You cant make someone learn, so tying teachers salaries to test scores is like tying a persons taxes to how much they take a dump.
Taxes: Ok, we gotta have them, but Jeez, can we make it so that the average American with a 16th grade education can at least figure this out?
Just some random thoughts inspired by our current national political debates.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
PROOF! Ghosts Do Not Exist!
Modern technology may have finally dispelled the purported existence of such mythical entities as Ghosts, Bigfoot, UFO’s, the Loch Ness Monster and the like. While it is difficult to prove a negative (that is, to prove something does not exist or did not happen), and thus one reason why tales of these things still persist in our modern world, the increasing lack of evidence significantly reduces the likelihood that such phantoms do, or ever did, exist.
In recent years, there has been an explosion in the availability and use of digital cameras and cell phones with digital cameras. Whether it’s a plane crash in a remote part of the world or Michael Richards, Kramer of Seinfeld fame, engaging in a racist rant on stage, it seems that there is invariably someone standing by with a camera, and the next thing you know the movie is up on Youtube. Additionally, with security cameras being so ubiquitous, it is hard to find an event that is not captured on some camera somewhere. Crime scene investigators often go to this resource when looking for clues and it often pays off. This was one way that they were able to track down Timothy McVay, the man responsible for the Oklahoma City bombing.
It’s hard to imagine that with all those cameras out there and all the things that would have previously gone unseen now getting out in the media, that there are really no new exciting photos of supposedly supernatural beings. For instance, several weeks ago hundreds of people in Texas reported seeing UFOs’ but only one person caught it on video, a video so poor the image could have been nearly anything.
People are still finding Bigfoot footprints, but when was the last time you saw new photographs? Search for images on the internet and the majority of pictures you will find are grainy old footage from the 1970’s and shots from Harry and the Hendersons. If “civilization” is indeed encroaching on the natural world, surely more contact would be occurring and thus more photographs of these creatures would be available. Sure, there are plenty of photographs of supposed ghosts, but most of the more contemporary images are of featureless “orbs” and not the full bodied apparitions, or even bodiless faces, that our human imagination has heretofore created as the model “ghost”.
For that matter, where is the evidence of ghostly activities, such as the moving of objects or other unexplained phenomenon? Again, if this sort of thing exists, why is there not more evidence of it today?
Even when hoaxers come forward and raise their hand, saying “yes, I faked the Loch Ness Monster”, or “I made the crop circles” many people still can’t bring themselves to disbelieve. Though, it’s getting harder and harder to believe even when confronted with so called proof. Photographs, the past high watermark for proof value, are so open to manipulation using easily available technology that they are now nearly useless as evidence. Many doctored photographs, touted as authentic, circulate via the World Wide Web, so many there are websites, such as Snopes.com dedicated to verifying their veracity or debunking exaggerated claims.
If you are looking for proof one way or the other, you can accept blurry images or dubious eye witness accounts without any hard evidence, or you can listen to the overwhelming silence on the subject, because there is no evidence and accept things like ghosts or Big Foot do not exist. Its time to relegate these stories to the campfires where they belong and allow millions of children world wide to sleep in peace knowing that there is no such thing as the boogey man.
In recent years, there has been an explosion in the availability and use of digital cameras and cell phones with digital cameras. Whether it’s a plane crash in a remote part of the world or Michael Richards, Kramer of Seinfeld fame, engaging in a racist rant on stage, it seems that there is invariably someone standing by with a camera, and the next thing you know the movie is up on Youtube. Additionally, with security cameras being so ubiquitous, it is hard to find an event that is not captured on some camera somewhere. Crime scene investigators often go to this resource when looking for clues and it often pays off. This was one way that they were able to track down Timothy McVay, the man responsible for the Oklahoma City bombing.
It’s hard to imagine that with all those cameras out there and all the things that would have previously gone unseen now getting out in the media, that there are really no new exciting photos of supposedly supernatural beings. For instance, several weeks ago hundreds of people in Texas reported seeing UFOs’ but only one person caught it on video, a video so poor the image could have been nearly anything.
People are still finding Bigfoot footprints, but when was the last time you saw new photographs? Search for images on the internet and the majority of pictures you will find are grainy old footage from the 1970’s and shots from Harry and the Hendersons. If “civilization” is indeed encroaching on the natural world, surely more contact would be occurring and thus more photographs of these creatures would be available. Sure, there are plenty of photographs of supposed ghosts, but most of the more contemporary images are of featureless “orbs” and not the full bodied apparitions, or even bodiless faces, that our human imagination has heretofore created as the model “ghost”.
For that matter, where is the evidence of ghostly activities, such as the moving of objects or other unexplained phenomenon? Again, if this sort of thing exists, why is there not more evidence of it today?
Even when hoaxers come forward and raise their hand, saying “yes, I faked the Loch Ness Monster”, or “I made the crop circles” many people still can’t bring themselves to disbelieve. Though, it’s getting harder and harder to believe even when confronted with so called proof. Photographs, the past high watermark for proof value, are so open to manipulation using easily available technology that they are now nearly useless as evidence. Many doctored photographs, touted as authentic, circulate via the World Wide Web, so many there are websites, such as Snopes.com dedicated to verifying their veracity or debunking exaggerated claims.
If you are looking for proof one way or the other, you can accept blurry images or dubious eye witness accounts without any hard evidence, or you can listen to the overwhelming silence on the subject, because there is no evidence and accept things like ghosts or Big Foot do not exist. Its time to relegate these stories to the campfires where they belong and allow millions of children world wide to sleep in peace knowing that there is no such thing as the boogey man.
Monday, February 11, 2008
Hope Springs Eternal
Its eight degrees with several inches of snow on the ground, the ground is frozen solid, as hard a concrete. Yet all the stores have their spring supplies out and in full bloom. Several stores I visited this past weekend were adorn with all manner of outdoor accoutrements, such as picnic tables, rakes, mulch and the like. There was even a spotting of a kayak! Its bright blue color an unmistakable sign of things to come. At the grocery store its pastel everywhere, with plastic eggs, fake grass, baskets and the obligatory Easter candy plentifully represented in the seasonal goods isle. Early, forced, tulips were to be found and bulbs, for those really thinking ahead, were out on display in several stores. Normally, I am opposed to such a display of seasonally misaligned wares, but not this time. My cabin fever has become a raging flu and I am ready for warm sunshine, long days and soft green grass. Thus, I walked through these aisles transfixed, taking it all in. I rejoiced in the heady aromas of the flowers and mulch, let my eyes dance across all the happy colors and felt the smooth handles of well known, long ago put away, garden tools; all of it bringing back a flood of warmer weather memories; visions of the past yet things to come. The groundhog may have seen his shadow, forecasting six more weeks of winter, but I saw a kayak and to me that means spring is just around the corner.
Friday, February 8, 2008
Prognostication
Ok, I am going to go out on a limb here and call the Presidential election now. Barring anyone stepping in a big pile of steaming doo, I think the party nominations will go to McCain and Obama. Hillary is faltering money wise. Hilary is too controversial. She has been in the Whitehouse for eight years already and I think people are tired of her. I know I am. I don’t believe she is elect able. Between Obama and McCain, again barring any real weirdness along the way, I think it will go to McCain. The Republicans will now have to line up behind him as the frontrunner and the veteran in the campaign. The religious right and the conservatives clearly run this country otherwise George W would not have been elected. These same folks will elect McCain. Personally, I would be willing to give either Obama and McCain a chance as they both have positions that I agree with and disagree with, if my choice had to come down to these two. So, there you go, lets see if history proves me right or wrong, but I wanted to put my opinion out there so that IF I am right, I can point to this day and say see, I knew it!
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Happy New Year!!!!!!!!
While you may have celebrated New Years last month today is Chinese New Year! The year of the Rat! Chinese New Year is the longest and most important celebration in the Chinese calendar. The Chinese year 4706 begins on Feb. 7, 2008.
Chinese months are reckoned by the lunar calendar, with each month beginning on the darkest day. New Year festivities traditionally start on the first day of the month and continue until the fifteenth, when the moon is brightest. In China, people may take weeks of holiday from work to prepare for and celebrate the New Year.
If you cant get ahold of me, now you know why! I'm gonna party like its 4707!
Chinese months are reckoned by the lunar calendar, with each month beginning on the darkest day. New Year festivities traditionally start on the first day of the month and continue until the fifteenth, when the moon is brightest. In China, people may take weeks of holiday from work to prepare for and celebrate the New Year.
If you cant get ahold of me, now you know why! I'm gonna party like its 4707!
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Whats in a Name?
Probably the most unfortunate product name in the history of mankind is “Ben-Gay”. You know what I mean! You know that every man owns a tube, but NEVER uses its real name. Hand me the “sports cream” will ya, hun? I got a pull in my groin. Six year olds out there had a never ending supply of childish comedic material. How ya’ ben, Gay? Does your father use BEN GAY? Ew!
We got along fine like this for years, but you know some hotshot somewhere one day, said “Hey, lets make a analgesic cream, and call it…. well it doesn’t matter what you call it, because whatever it is has got to be better than Ben-Gay! We’ll make millions because no man is going to buy Ben-Gay, when there is an alternative out there”! We could call it Snot Cream and people will still buy our product rather than ask for Ben Gay! We’ll be rich!
Men would rather buy tampons than Ben Gay, at least it shows you either have a woman in your life or you’re a gangster concerned about pluggin’ your bullet holes when someone busts a cap in your ass!
Then again Smuckers Jam aint that great a name either!
We got along fine like this for years, but you know some hotshot somewhere one day, said “Hey, lets make a analgesic cream, and call it…. well it doesn’t matter what you call it, because whatever it is has got to be better than Ben-Gay! We’ll make millions because no man is going to buy Ben-Gay, when there is an alternative out there”! We could call it Snot Cream and people will still buy our product rather than ask for Ben Gay! We’ll be rich!
Men would rather buy tampons than Ben Gay, at least it shows you either have a woman in your life or you’re a gangster concerned about pluggin’ your bullet holes when someone busts a cap in your ass!
Then again Smuckers Jam aint that great a name either!
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