SURVIVAL OF THE BARELY ADEQUATE.

Recently, I have had the displeasure of having to deal with several local and state government agencies. Whenever I do, I walk away with the same puzzling questions on my mind as, “Who hired these people”? and “How do they remain employed”?

In these experiences, I can’t help but believe that human beings have evolved to the point of devolution, as evidenced by the people with whom I have come into contact. No longer are we bound by the rules of having to adapt or perish. Today, with our modern society and technology, all sorts of people can survive, thrive, and more freightingly, procreate; passing on their sordid DNA to their misbegotten spawn. Generation after generation of such individuals must have passed to bring us the level of low-brow intelligence which is attracted to employment at, say, the DMV or Planning and Zoning.

In a competitive market environment, embodied by such shows as “Apprentice” and “Hells Kitchen”, which are enjoyed by millions of TV viewers”, the barely adequate don’t stand a chance. However, they have adopted other survival strategies, such as the labor union, unemployment and the Family Medical Leave Act. Basically, the price to be paid for running a successful business is having to foot the bill for a bunch of people who otherwise would have no way of making a living, unless they work for the Tax Assessors Office or maybe the cable company maybe.

What kills me is that if I spoke to some of my employees the way that Donald Trump, or that Chef guy, talks to his employees, they’d run screaming to the EEOC complaining about a hostile work environment. Many of these people are the same people who watch these shows and admire the “Boss” stars for their hard-nosed business ethic.

I’m not expecting a lot, you understand, only the ability to function at a level that an unschooled child could muster. I’m talking about people who lack the social skills to say, “hello”, cant add, subtract or multiply without a calculator ( if they know how to work that ) or the ability to do more than one project at a time per day, your basic stuff. The mystery is how they get hired in the first place. Once they’re in a job however, they hold on like a tick and after 15 years they are somehow in charge by default. My father in law calls this people “glorified baggers” the people in a grocery store who start out as baggers but end up being the store manager for no other reason they were the only person still around.

Heck, I guess even the D+ student has to eat. I hear that the state may be lifting its hiring freeze again. Bon appetite!